Safety Tips For You And Your Family

The following information has been adapted from the American Bar Association Commission on Domestic Violence website (http://www.abanet.org/domviol/home.html) to provide general safety tips to domestic violence victims.

The Queensland Police Service, in providing this information, makes no representations nor gives any warranty or guarantee concerning the safety of persons or property.

To find the contact details of the regional domestic violence service in your area, call:

Domestic Violence Telephone Service:
1800 811 811
1800 812 225 (TTY)

Whether or not you feel able to leave an abuser, there are things you can do to make yourself and your family safer. The following are a list of actions you could take that may make you safer. This list is not exhaustive.

In an emergency

If you are at home and you are being threatened or attacked:

• Stay away from the kitchen (the abuser can find weapons, like knives, there);
  
• Stay away from bathrooms, closets or small spaces where the abuser can trap you;
  
• Get to a room with a door or window to escape;
  
• Get to a room with a telephone to call for help; lock the abuser outside if you can;
  
• Call 000 right away for help;
  
• Have a neighbour or friend you can run to for help;
  
• When a police officer comes, tell him/her what happened; record their name, rank and station;
  
• Get medical help if you are hurt;
  
• Take photographs of bruises or injuries;
  
• Call the Domestic Violence Telephone Service (1800 811 811); ask them to refer you to a regional domestic violence service to help you make a safety plan.

How to protect yourself at home

• Learn where to get help;
  
• Keep a telephone in a room you can lock from the inside; if possible, get a mobile telephone that you keep with you at all times;
  
• If the abuser has moved out, change the locks on your doors; get locks on the windows;
  
• Plan an escape route out of your home; teach it to your children;
  
• Plan where you would go if you need to escape;
  
• Ask your neighbours to call the police if they see the abuser at your house; make a signal for them to call the police, for example, if the telephone rings twice, a curtain is closed or a specific light is on;
  
• Pack a bag with important things you'd need if you had to leave quickly; put it in a safe place, or give it to a friend or relative you trust. Include cash, car keys, change of clothes (include underwear) and important information such as: court papers, passport or birth certificates, medical records and medicines, immigration papers, marriage certificate. You may also wish to include one of your child’s favorite toys;
  
• Get a silent telephone number;
  
• Use an answering machine; screen the calls;
  
• Consider enrolling in a Personal Safety course conducted by the Queensland Police Service. Contact your local police station for details.

How to make your children safer

• Teach them not to intervene in the event of an attack, even if they want to help;
  
• Teach them how to get to safety, to telephone 000, to give your address and telephone number to the police;
  
• Teach them who else to call for help, perhaps another family member, trusted friend etc.;
  
• Tell them to stay out of the kitchen at the time of an attack;
• Give the principal at school or the daycare centre copies of your court order(s); tell them not to release your children to anyone without talking to you first if a court has so ordered; use a password so they can be sure it is you on the telephone; give them a photograph of the abuser;
  
• Make sure the children know who to tell at school if they see the abuser;
  
• Make sure that the school knows not to give your address or telephone number to ANYONE

How to protect yourself outside the home

• Change your regular travel habits;
  
• Try to get rides with different people;
  
• Shop and bank in a different place;
  
• Cancel any bank accounts or credit cards you shared with the abuser; open new accounts at a different bank;
  
• Keep your court order(s) and emergency telephone numbers with you at all times;
  
• Keep a mobile telephone and program it to 000.

How to make yourself safer at work

• Keep a copy of your court order(s) at work;
  
• Give a photograph of the abuser to security and friends at work;
  
• Tell your supervisors - see if they can make it harder for the abuser to find you;
  
• Don't go to lunch alone;
  
• Ask a security officer or other trusted friend to walk you to your car or transport;
  
• If the abuser contacts you at work, save voice mail and e-mail messages;
  
• Your employer may be able to help you find support/referral agencies to help you.

Using the law to help you

Protection orders

• Ask your local police station, domestic violence service or lawyer how you can obtain a protection order.

• Order the abuser to stay away from you or your children;
  
• Order the abuser to leave your home;
  
• Order the police to come to your home while the abuser picks up personal belongings;
  
• Order the abuser to go to a perpetrator and/or behaviour modification program if permitted by legislation;
  
• Order the abuser not to contact you, either at work or home;
  
• Order the abuser to surrender all firearms and weapons to the police and prohibit the abuser from lawfully having possession of a weapon for the duration of the order.

If you are worried about any of the following, make sure you:

• Tell the police of any safety concerns you have for yourself or your children;
  
• Ask the magistrate via the police prosecutor to order the abuser to pick up and return the children at a safe place;
  
• Ask that any visits the abuser is permitted are at very specific times so the police will know by reading the protection order if the abuser is there at the wrong time;
  
• Tell the police if the abuser has harmed or threatened the children; ask that visits be supervised; think about who could do that for you;
  
• Get a copie of the court order(s);
  
• Keep copies of court order(s) with you at all times.

Court proceedings

• Show the police prosecutor your court order(s);
  
• Show the police prosecutor medical records about your injuries or photographs if you have them;
  
• Tell the police prosecutor the name of anyone who is helping you (a support person, lawyer etc.);
  
• Tell the police prosecutor about any witnesses to injuries or abuse;
  
• Ask the police prosecutor to notify you ahead of time if the abuser is to be released from custody (if applicable).

Be safe at the courthouse

• Sit as far away from the abuser as you can; you don't have to look at or talk to the abuser; you don't have to talk to the abuser's family or friends if they are there;
  
• Bring a friend or relative with you to wait until your case is heard;
  
• Tell court staff if you are afraid of the abuser and ask them to look out for you;
  
• Make sure you have a copy of your protection order before you leave;
  
• In order to leave quickly, ask court staff to engage the abuser in conversation when court is over by offering to explain the process to the abuser, including consequences of the order and breaches;
  
• If you think the abuser is following you when you leave, call the police immediately;
  
• If you have to travel to another state for work or to get away from the abuser, take your protection order with you and contact local police in your new town when you arrive in order to make the necessary arrangements to register your protection order in that state.

REMEMBER IN AN EMERGENCY, CALL 000